By Arshia Mahajan (25S06R) and Liew Shan Yik (25A01A, Peer Helper)

Your resident Aunties and Uncles are back with our Ask Aunt Agony and Uncle Upset column, this time as a collaboration between Raffles Press and Peer Helpers’ Programme (PHP)! Ever wanted to rant about that someone you just can’t stand? Overwhelmed with too many feelings? Submit your confessions to https://tinyurl.com/RIAAUU and we’ll give them our best shot. This column will be published at the end of every month.

Dear Discouraged David,

Many JC students (or indeed, students in general) have entertained the notion of dropping out of school at some point in their lives. Evidently, though, what may be a passing joke for some can be a serious conviction for others.

There are numerous reasons as to why you might want to drop out of school, ranging from academic pressure, to feelings of isolation from one’s peers. Leaving school prematurely is certainly not the most ideal path to take, and definitely requires careful thought about the costs, benefits and alternative courses of action. Hopefully, this article can help you understand the circumstances, consequences and considerations of discontinuing your studies so that you can make a more informed choice.

What is the school’s policy on dropping out?

According to the Y5-6 student handbook, students who wish to prematurely “discontinue” their studies must inform their Civics Tutor and the Admissions Office via admissions@ri.edu.sg with at least 2 months’ notice. They must provide “a parent’s letter or email,…a copy of student’s EZ-Link Card…[and] other supporting documents”, which can include an admissions letter from another school.

If a student’s application is approved, a Leaving Certificate will be prepared for them, unless they have studied in RI for less than one school month. This can be collected on the last day of school, or from the Student Affairs Centre (SAC) at any time within the next 5 years. In addition, testimonials will not be issued for any students who leave before they have completed their course of study in RI.

Academic Issues

But why would you want to drop out?

Perhaps, you feel that the workload of JC subjects is far too heavy for you. After all, the Singapore-Cambridge GCE A-Levels are one of the most demanding series of standardised exams ever designed, and the lecture-tutorial system does expect students to be far more independent in their learning.

It certainly does not help that the transition from secondary school to JC is considered to be one of the biggest jumps when it comes to academics. Given the sheer amount of content that has to be learnt, revised and subsequently applied in the short time you have at JC, managing these subjects can feel like an insurmountable chore.

This is especially true if you have extracurriculars, like a CCA (or two), a Wednesday Enrichment Programme (WEP) or a Community Engagement (CE) Project. Juggling all these commitments at the same time can result in a vicious cycle of sleep deprivation and burnout, which in turn causes pressure to build.

Naturally, RI is also a competitive environment, so you may feel additional pressure from your friends if they appear to be performing much better in class tests or exams.

Nonetheless, you should consider the fact that many of your peers are likely experiencing the same struggles as you, mental or physical. This does not negate your own experience, but it does remind you that you are not in this alone. With this mindset in mind, it is important to seek help early. For example, you can approach your classmates who are taking a similar subject combination to study with you, or to clarify a certain concept.

Most importantly, if your performance in a certain subject is particularly weak, you should contact your subject tutors to ask for a formal consultation in order to clarify your doubts. If you need help managing your time, or need advice on how to revise for your exams, your peers and subject tutors are once again your first port of call. 

However, this is not to say that dropping out of school due to academic reasons should be avoided at all costs. The vocational approach offered by polytechnic courses could be more suited to your learning style, and may even be more relevant to what you wish to pursue in tertiary education. You could also choose to enrol in a one-year pre-university foundation course, do other courses with private universities or institutes, or continue your schooling overseas. 

Nevertheless, any field of study at this stage is bound to bring its unique challenges to the table, so you should consider your learning needs carefully before making the decision to leave. You may also consider consulting RI’s Higher Education Office as they are well-equipped to provide you with the best possible advice.

Social Issues

Perhaps your grades are just fine.

Nevertheless, you may feel that you do not belong in the school, because your classmates or CCA-mates have not spoken to you since the class bonding programmes in March. Although you know that everyone is busy with their commitments, surely this does not mean that they have no time to respond to your messages or talk to you during breaks at all? Or maybe, you do participate in their conversations, but feel left out when someone brings up the latest pop culture reference, or inside joke that everyone seems to understand.

Everyone, except you.

Feelings of loneliness can be quite common, especially in a JC environment. Most people have already formed friend groups that go back several years, and the transient memories of bonding with your Orientation groupmates or classmates may not be enough to bridge these gaps. During these times, you may feel that your presence is practically ignored by everyone else, and seeing other people naturally congregate with others during recess may only exacerbate those feelings.

Furthermore, you may even begin to blame yourself, and question if there is a personality trait or mannerism that everybody dislikes about you. Such problems can be far more difficult to address compared to academic issues, given that there is no straightforward solution and you cannot force others to be “interested” in socialising with you.

At these times, it is important to once again acknowledge your feelings, but also prevent them from overshadowing your thought process. What do you look for in a friend? Is it just casual companionship that matches your sense of humour, or are you also looking for a study buddy and someone you can discuss important life issues with? Moreover, how much time can you spend with your friends, and do you expect the same of them?

Re-evaluating your expectations can certainly help you find people that you connect better with, and in avoiding disappointment when people do not fulfil them. It is also important not to confine your social circle to your classmates or CCA-mates, because your future best friends can come from anywhere!

Communication is also key. If you feel uncomfortable or isolated in any setting, it is important to speak out and let your peers understand. Often, your peers may not have noticed that they have been inadvertently excluding you! Developing the confidence to voice your own needs is a key social skill, and who knows? Maybe those pop culture references are not so difficult to understand after all.

Extenuating Circumstances

Of course, other situations can leave you with no choice but to drop out. Issues like family issues, financial concerns, or any other kind of personal problems that force you out of school. It can be tough having to potentially uproot your entire life and leave behind everyone you know. School is likely a major part of your life, with most students spending more than half their time at school and the other half doing school-related work. 

As such, it is easy to fall into a state of feeling empty and purposeless after dropping out. This can be inevitable, and paired with the circumstances that made you drop out of school in the first place, this onslaught tends to be overwhelming. During these times, it is important not to shoulder all your burdens by yourself. 

Hence, you should make sure to have a support system to turn to, be it your family, friends, or even your (ex-)teachers. No matter how bleak things might seem at the moment, they will be sure to help you get through it and things will get better.

In Summary

Dropping out of school is a major life decision with far-reaching consequences. Undeniably, there are valid reasons to discontinue your studies, and it can feel like you have no other choice. Nonetheless, it is important to carefully consider your precise situation before you quit. Is dropping out the only way out, or are there alternatives that can make your situation work? 

Naturally, you should discuss discontinuing your studies with your family before you take any action. At this point in our lives, though, it is important to take ownership of your decisions and understand when you should quit. Besides consulting this article, you can also approach a peer helper, your Civics Tutor, the school management, or our in-house counsellors at Raffles Guidance Centre (RGC). Ultimately, the decision is yours to take (and the school’s, to make). 

Choose wisely. 

Sincerely,

Aunt Agony and Uncle Upset

If you need anyone to talk to about any issues you might be facing, do drop by My Rest Space near Marymount gate and talk to one of our peer helpers! We’re open on Tuesday from 2.30 – 4.30 p.m, Wednesday 11.00 a.m. – 3.00 p.m., Thursday 2.30 – 4.30 p.m. and Friday 1.30 – 4.30 p.m. If you would like to meet a peer helper on a regular basis, do email us a request at rafflesinstitutionphp@gmail.com or fill in our request form at our website https://rafflesinstitution5.wixsite.com/rafflespeerhelpers/peer-helping-request!